4 Tips for Recovering from Loss
Updated: Nov 14, 2022
Have you lost something that you want to recover? What did you lose: your confidence, your hope, or have you lost your way? This week, I’ll share four principles based on an experience from the life of David before he became king of Israel and how he recovered from loss.
The word recover means to get back something lost or taken away, especially by making an effort. Whether physical, emotional, or spiritual, recovery requires effort. If you want to recover a physical object, you must put forth the effort to find it. If you want to recover something emotionally or spiritually, it will require effort to change your mindset, attitude, or perspective. You may need to reach out to request others to help you in your recovery effort.
The good news is that God wants to help you recover what’s been lost or taken from you.
In 1 Samuel 30, when David and his men returned from their military campaign, they discovered that a band of raiders had attacked their camp, burned everything to the ground, and abducted their wives and children. Understandably, David and his men were overwhelmed with grief. First Samuel 30:4 says, “They wept until they could weep no more.” David’s situation grew even more direr because his men blamed him for their loss and were contemplating stoning him. Let’s look at how David approached this situation.
1. Don’t Seek to Blame, Seek the Lord
David’s men blamed him for their loss, but he didn’t try to shift the blame. He didn’t retaliate or fight back. David didn’t withdraw or deny the reality of the situation. Those are all natural tendencies for dealing with conflict stemming from the grief of loss.
However, after regaining his composure and presence of mind, David strengthened himself in the Lord his God (1 Samuel 30:6). Fortunately, David had developed his relationship with the Lord before the crisis of the moment struck so that he knew where to turn for strength. David didn’t seek to blame others for his misfortune, instead, he sought the Lord his God. He called for Abiathar the priest to bring him the sacred ephod so that he could inquire of the Lord for guidance and direction.
2. Ask the Right Questions
It’s okay to ask God questions when you don’t know what to do. But as we read in James 1:5-7, we must ask in faith with the expectation that God will answer.
"If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord."
David didn’t ask God, “Why me Lord? Or why did you let this happen?” David’s questions were predicated on his relationship with God. He knew that if he talked with God, God would answer him. Therefore, David asked the Lord, very specifically, “Should I chase after this band of raiders? And will I catch them?”
3. Expect an Answer
David expected to receive an answer to his petition. The answer he received from the Lord was, “Yes, go after them. You will surely recover everything that was taken from you!”
4. Put Faith into Action
After receiving direction, David acted. He responded by rallying his troops and setting out to rescue their families and property that had been abducted. After a diligent search, David and his men caught up with the Amalekite raiders and recovered everything that had been taken. Remember, it’s not enough to know God’s promise of assurance. You must put your faith into action because faith without works is dead (James 2:26).
So, what do you want to recover? Is there is something missing in your marriage or some other relationship that you want to recover? If so, remember God knows what’s missing and He will show you through His word, how to recover what you’ve lost. We’ve recorded several great promises from scripture in our blog post, The ABCs For a Fulfilling Marriage. If we can support you in your relationship recovery process, please connect with us.
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